I'm Tired

[JLB Please excuse me, I'm a Dick. Not a moron just a Dick Find all posts View Profile Close JLB]

Wow! All one has to do is look at the topics of my threads here in the Hot Tub and see that I am one bad dude!!!

There can be no doubt that I must be the world's worst rabble-rousing trouble-maker, a person who thrives on conflict and can't get along with anyone!

That is not true. Although I did choose the road less traveled by 35 years ago, turning away from certain fame and fortune, the road I chose has been a great one. Most of the journey has been without incident, without confrontation. Relative to the rest of the world it has been materially successful and fulfilling. And we have accomplished that by making others happy, gaining friends along the way, and without hurting others.

There's no place in the world we would rather be.

But starting four years ago that all seem to change. My life became infinitely less simple and more combative because of things I often had very little control over, because of other peoples' actions. My last four years has been spent reacting to the actions of others.

I could not control the death of my parents, their poor preparation for the inevitiable, and the bad behavior of stock brokers, brokerages, thieves, attorneys, executors, brother and stepsisters.

I could not know the nature of our neighbors when we bought our house in what appeared to be paradise, that others were leaving to get away from them.

I could not anticipate the wrath of others as they sit at computers far removed from me.

I could not anticipate how hard justice is to come by.

But I have been fighting several parallel battles the past four years, simultaneously, like the plate juggler trying to keep them all spinning. It seems like all I do is go from one to the next to the next to the next, eat a burger, have a Bud Light, go to bed, and start all over the next day.

Each battle is similar in that it pits the things I value and try to stand for, personal worth and character, against wealth, rank and privilege. Each of them is an uphill battle.

The other side in each battle has told me what I can say and not say, and how I need to act, to fit in, and if I don't, they will get rid of me.

That's uncharted water for me, not being the ultimate team player.

I believe that good wins out, that when the one great scorer comes to score against your name, it matters not if you won or lost but how you played the game. That's what it said in the gym at the community center where I played basketball at 12-years-old, and that's how I still play the game today.

I try to play it with honesty and dignity and I try to put up a challenge, make things difficult for those who don't play the same way. But in each case they have had the upper hand, been in control, and all I could do is react to their actions. In each case it has been their ball game and I have been the visiting team.

Some I've won, some I've lost, and some got rained out.

In each case I have brought out into the open what I consider to be personal injustices, so that others know to tread lightly. What I've won, I've had to bulldog to get.

Because of this I have gotten close to some of you, and distant from some of you. I guess that is the nature of battles.

This has been my Cheers lately.

All I can hope is that when I'm laid to rest the most truthful epitaph on my tombstone would be See, I Told You Something Was Wrong.

I'm tired.

I will never give up on what is right and good, and appreciate the encouragement from those who have given it.

But I'm tired.

I feel like doing what both my supporters and detractors encourage me to do, give it a rest, take some time off, enjoy the lake.

[bigfrank Administrator Find all posts View Profile Close bigfrank]

Jim if your tired and want to relax. Try taking up Cigar smoking. I take a few hours a day to do this. I sit in my yard with no one around and think about what has to get done. I did not say do what has to be done I said think. See if my wife told me to throw out the trash forexample. I thought about it. If she asks me later did you do it, I can now say I thought about it and forgot. See how I got out of that one.

Sitting by the lake and smoking a cigar in one hand a beer in the other well I think you can get many thoughts in and relax.

[Keitht Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close Keitht]

Jim,

Work on a variation of the carpenter's rule of "Measure twice, cut once", and think twice, write/say once.
On a board such as this it is very easy for comments to be misinterpreted and trivial differences of opinion to escalate into fullscale war.
I actually had somebody PM me who thought from reading some of my posts that my views were diametrically opposed to theirs. The reality is that we actually agreed completely on the subject.
If that can happen when people are trying to agree, just imagine what it can be like when there actually is a difference of opinion.

[Fern Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Fern]

Jim,
It took me many years and the serious illness of my mom to learn one of life's biggest lessons: I can't control what other people do or say. All I can do is control my own actions and responses (note I didn't say "reactions," that has stressful connotations). Its made me a more relaxed person. Am I perfect? No. But I am trying.

Fern

Wow! All one has to do is look at the topics of my threads here in the Hot Tub and see that I am one bad dude!!!

There can be no doubt that I must be the world's worst rabble-rousing trouble-maker, a person who thrives on conflict and can't get along with anyone!

That is not true. Although I did choose the road less traveled by 35 years ago, turning away from certain fame and fortune, the road I chose has been a great one. Most of the journey has been without incident, without confrontation. Relative to the rest of the world it has been materially successful and fulfilling. And we have accomplished that by making others happy, gaining friends along the way, and without hurting others.

There's no place in the world we would rather be.

But starting four years ago that all seem to change. My life became infinitely less simple and more combative because of things I often had very little control over, because of other peoples' actions. My last four years has been spent reacting to the actions of others.

[Oracle Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Oracle]

Jim,

You need to learn how to create a temporary SEP field:

The Somebody Else's Problem field (SEP field) is a fictional technology from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy "trilogy" by Douglas Adams. It is a cheaper and more practical alternative to an invisibility field.

Simply put, an SEP field is an energy field similar to an invisibility field. When somebody, or something, is surrounded by a SEP field, the human brain perceives it as "somebody else's problem", and therefore will be incapable of paying attention to the object (or even seeing it, or recognizing its existence) unless it is being specifically looked for. In order for this to work, however, the object being hidden by the field must be sufficiently bizarre. For example, encompassing an ordinary mountain in an SEP field would have no effect. But if one were to first paint the mountain pink, then the SEP field would cause anyone who sees it to ignore its existence, a pink mountain being a sufficiently bizarre sight. A primary example of this was given in the third book Life, the Universe and Everything, when a UFO (a spaceship powered by the Bistromathic drive owned by the character Slartibartfast) lands in the middle of a cricket ground during a match, and the assembled crowd completely ignores it. Another prime example occurs when the aforementioned ship's field is extended so that the characters fail to notice the fact that they cannot breathe or the fact that the asteroid that they are standing on does not have enough gravitational force to hold them down.

The SEP field requires much less energy than a normal invisibility field (a single torch battery can run it for over a hundred years) due to the natural propensity of humans to see things as Somebody Else's Problem. This is very close to the idea suggested by Terry Pratchett (who has often been compared to Douglas Adams): People do not see whatever they are sure cannot be there (such as Death).

The idea of the SEP field has some grounding in the real life idea known as static filtering, in which people immediately disregard information contrary to what is expected. An example of malicious use of static filtering is subliminal messages in film. This theory is also put to practice in the film Fight Club; we are shown brief glimpses of a specific character as he suddenly appears and disappears, yet first-time viewers will generally disregard the flash unless they are told about its significance.

I do it all the time.

[shopgirl Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close shopgirl]

Maybe I am thick-skinned, but Rick says the opposite....

Jim has never offended me, nor do I think he has ever offended anyone else, not intentionally.

Honesty is a virtue that few of us use often. Jim is very honest and his honesty has gotten him into some trouble. I have never heard a discouraging word about OLCC from Jim, yet he is consistently criticized for having an opinion on the resort. How is that fair?

I am offended by others who believe that everything that cometh from their typing fingers smells like a rose. How do you say this nicely: "you must be too fat to fit into the very large bathtubs." You say this: "hubby and I fit in the bathtub just fine, so do my brother and his wife " This is in response to a statement made by another that their bathtub was of regular size, not a large tub for two.

As for Jim's OLCC thread for exchangers to post the unit and area they received on trade, that was an important one for me personally, because I was going to go to OLCC again, but I need to know that OLCC will listen to me when I request a different area than I had before. If there is no data to give me that courage to try the resort again, then I will not even try. OLCC has lost me forever. I am sure some will say, "good riddance."


Edited to add: I just saw that JLB posted the same thread here, on Timeshareforums. Great! Now I can watch the results and determine if we have a snowball's chance in Arizona in July of getting a new unit. Thanks! Should I post about our last exchange to OLCC? It was a while ago, so I would say that would skew the results.

[nursetanya1973 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close nursetanya1973]

Jim,

Just a word of encouragement, I read your posts because they are insightful, truthful and often entertaining. I have never taken offense and often feel for your plight. Please remember you have friends all around you.

Tanya

[grest Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close grest]

Be happy, Jim, whatever that means for you and your wife...I don't blame you for being tired of the fighting...I'm amazed you've hung in there so long. I like what's right to win out too, but sometimes I just need to let go of what I cannot control.
Wishing you peace, whatever you decide.
Connie

[M. Henley Class President Find all posts View Profile Close M. Henley]

Ol' Jim

Spect' we need more ol' Jims in this world. Maybe they would eventually stamp out the OFs completely.
Have stayed at OLCC and have no idea why anyone would prefer that over many of the other extremely luxurious available resorts in the area.

[BocaBum99 Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close BocaBum99]

Obviously, it's bothering you that others appear to be attacking you and your positions. That is a natural thing unless your screen name is Carolinian. He is one of the few who is unaffected by attacks.

I'm sure your are a good guy. You are provocative, a good data gatherer, a logical person and a friend of the board. Personal attacks come with the territory. The easiest way to stop the attacks is to change the style in which you post.

Message board posting has got to be the single best example of Karma. Everything you post in the past follows with your screen name. So, you can post something that seems very innocuous and certain people will come out dressed in full war paint to combat what they think you are saying rather than what you are actually saying. In fact, I did that very thing to you a couple of times in the past.

To change this, just change the way you post. Start being genuinely kind and not sarcastic. People will respond with kindness. And, if someone attacks you, others will defend you. That will make you feel good. Try it for a couple of months. You will be amazed at how well it will work as long as its genuine.

Obviously, you should and will choose to do whatever you want. The good news is that you are totally in control of how others will respond to you simply by making slight changes to the way you post.

Lastly, someone wise told me once that everyone wants to be loved. But, not everyone wants to love. That was a very astute observation. How it relates to message board posting is that when being provocative, a person needs to decide if its more important for them to be liked or to be right. Because the more "right" you are, the less "liked" you will become.

For me, I want to be loved. But, I'd rather be right.

[JLB Please excuse me, I'm a Dick. Not a moron just a Dick Find all posts View Profile Close JLB]

I'm resting , with another beautiful day on the dock, but being liked has not been high on my priorities. Being truthful and fighting for right has been.

That does not mean that I am combative, abrasive and insulting, as those who have been here know. It just means I am one of those who will not sit still for injustice.

I have learned a lot the last four years. I have learned that some don't care about truth and right. They don't care so much they tell you to your face, they let themselves be recorded saying it, "We don't care about what is right, about the law. We are going to do whatever we need to do to get what we want."

I sense that going on on Internet forums also, the truth being what falls through the cracks.

Well, Jenny and our guests already headed down to the dock, so I guess I'll be going.

[love2fly Member Find all posts View Profile Close love2fly]

There is good, and there is better

I have learned that some don't care about truth and right.

There are many such people. I know such folks, and some are very good people. Now you also seem like a good person, but it is not the same.

You may have heard the truism "Bad things happen when good people do nothing".

That is what makes you different from (and IMO better than) the good people.

[katiemack Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close katiemack]

Spect' we need more ol' Jims in this world.

AMEN!

Maybe they would eventually stamp out the OFs completely.

Wouldn't that be a wonderful day!

Have stayed at OLCC and have no idea why anyone would prefer that over many of the other extremely luxurious available resorts in the area.

EXACTLY!

[chemteach Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close chemteach]

Jim,
You are one of very few people who will fight for right in just about any instance. There are not many like you out there - and that is a pity. It is true that when people sit idly by, bad things happen.

People like you cause the rest of us to think.

Get rest if you need it, but here's a thumbs up for what you do.

Edye

[tonyg Goomba & Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close tonyg]

I have someone who won't talk to me anymore because I say bad things about Westgate's resorts. So be it- I still think Westgate sucks and I'll still say so. Any resort that discriminates by giving sub-standard lodging or service to exchangers sucks and contributes to the dissatisfaction of timeshare exchanging as a whole.