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Shunning Facebook, and Living to Tell About It- New York Times

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  • Shunning Facebook, and Living to Tell About It- New York Times

    Shunning Facebook, and Living to Tell About It
    New York Times By JENNA WORTHAM | New York Times – Tue, Dec 13, 2011 7:02 PM EST
    Shunning Facebook, and Living to Tell About It - Yahoo! Finance

    Correction Appended

    Tyson Balcomb quit Facebook after a chance encounter on an elevator. He found himself standing next to a woman he had never met — yet through Facebook he knew what her older brother looked like, that she was from a tiny island off the coast of Washington and that she had recently visited the Space Needle in Seattle.

    “I knew all these things about her, but I’d never even talked to her,” said Mr. Balcomb, a pre-med student in Oregon who had some real-life friends in common with the woman. “At that point I thought, maybe this is a little unhealthy.”

    As Facebook prepares for a much-anticipated public offering, the company is eager to show off its momentum by building on its huge membership: more than 800 million active users around the world, Facebook says, and roughly 200 million in the United States, or two-thirds of the population.

    But the company is running into a roadblock in this country. Some people, even on the younger end of the age spectrum, just refuse to participate, including people who have given it a try.

    One of Facebook’s main selling points is that it builds closer ties among friends and colleagues. But some who steer clear of the site say it can have the opposite effect of making them feel more, not less, alienated.

    “I wasn’t calling my friends anymore,” said Ashleigh Elser, 24, who is in graduate school in Charlottesville, Va. “I was just seeing their pictures and updates and felt like that was really connecting to them.”

    To be sure, the Facebook-free life has its disadvantages in an era when people announce all kinds of major life milestones on the Web. Ms. Elser has missed engagements and pictures of new-born babies. But none of that hurt as much as the gap she said her Facebook account had created between her and her closest friends. So she shut it down.

    Many of the holdouts mention concerns about privacy. Those who study social networking say this issue boils down to trust. Amanda Lenhart, who directs research on teenagers, children and families at the Pew Internet and American Life Project, said that people who use Facebook tend to have “a general sense of trust in others and trust in institutions.” She added: “Some people make the decision not to use it because they are afraid of what might happen.”

    Ms. Lenhart noted that about 16 percent of Americans don’t have cellphones. “There will always be holdouts,” she said.

    Facebook executives say they don’t expect everyone in the country to sign up. Instead they are working on ways to keep current users on the site longer, which gives the company more chances to show them ads. And the company’s biggest growth is now in places like Asia and Latin America, where there might actually be people who have not yet heard of Facebook.

    “Our goal is to offer people a meaningful, fun and free way to connect with their friends, and we hope that’s appealing to a broad audience,” said Jonathan Thaw, a Facebook spokesman.

    But the figures on growth in this country are stark. The number of Americans who visited Facebook grew 10 percent in the year that ended in October — down from 56 percent growth over the previous year, according to comScore, which tracks Internet traffic.

    Ray Valdes, an analyst at Gartner, said this slowdown was not a make-or-break issue ahead of the company’s public offering, which could come in the spring. What does matter, he said, is Facebook’s ability to keep its millions of current users entertained and coming back.

    “They’re likely more worried about the novelty factor wearing off,” Mr. Valdes said. “That’s a continual problem that they’re solving, and there are no permanent solutions.”

    Erika Gable, 29, who lives in Brooklyn and does public relations for restaurants, never understood the appeal of Facebook in the first place. She says the daily chatter that flows through the site — updates about bad hair days and pictures from dinner — is virtual clutter she doesn’t need in her life.

    “If I want to see my fifth cousin’s second baby, I’ll call them,” she said with a laugh.

    Ms. Gable is not a Luddite. She has an iPhone and sometimes uses Twitter. But when it comes to creating a profile on the world’s biggest social network, her tolerance reaches its limits.

    “I remember having MySpace for a bit and always feeling so weird about seeing other people’s stuff all the time,” she said. “I’m not into it.”

    Will Brennan, a 26-year-old Brooklyn resident, said he had “heard too many horror stories” about the privacy pitfalls of Facebook. But he said friends are not always sympathetic to his anti-social-media stance.

    “I get asked to sign up at least twice a month,” said Mr. Brennan. “I get harangued for ruining their plans by not being on Facebook.”

    And whether there is haranguing involved or not, the rebels say their no-Facebook status tends to be a hot topic of conversation — much as a decision not to own a television might have been in an earlier media era.

    “People always raise an eyebrow,” said Chris Munns, 29, who works as a systems administrator in New York. “But my life has gone on just fine without it. I’m not a shut-in. I have friends and quite an enjoyable life in Manhattan, so I can’t say it makes me feel like I’m missing out on life at all.”

    But the peer pressure is only going to increase. Susan Etlinger, an analyst at the Altimeter Group, said society was adopting new behaviors and expectations in response to the near-ubiquity of Facebook and other social networks.

    “People may start to ask the question that, if you aren’t on social channels, why not? Are you hiding something?” she said. “The norms are shifting.”

    This kind of thinking cuts both ways for the Facebook holdouts. Mr. Munns said his dating life had benefited from his lack of an online dossier: “They haven’t had a chance to dig up your entire life on Facebook before you meet.”

    But Ms. Gable said such background checks were the one thing she needed Facebook for.

    “If I have a crush on a guy, I’ll make my friends look him up for me,” Ms. Gable said. “But that’s as far as it goes.”


    Correction: December 13, 2011, Tuesday

    This article has been revised to reflect the following correction: An earlier version of this article misstated the percentage of Americans who do not have cellphones, as estimated by the Pew Internet and American Life Project. It is 16 percent, not 5 percent. Also, a caption incorrectly spelled Erika Gable’s name as Ericka.
    Lawren
    ------------------------
    There are many wonderful places in the world, but one of my favourite places is on the back of my horse.
    - Rolf Kopfle

  • #2
    I don't have a facebook. Even without having one, people still find out stuff about me because of other people posting their every move. Someone I met in passing once even put a picture of me on her page. Too weird for me.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by Presley View Post
      I don't have a facebook. Even without having one, people still find out stuff about me because of other people posting their every move. Someone I met in passing once even put a picture of me on her page. Too weird for me.
      I opened an account and never did anything with it. I am grateful that I did or I would never have gotten an important message from someone in May who tracked me down via e-mail through Facebook.

      I do not participate in these things as I mistrust social networking sites.
      Lawren
      ------------------------
      There are many wonderful places in the world, but one of my favourite places is on the back of my horse.
      - Rolf Kopfle

      Comment


      • #4
        No facebook for me- my wife joined but rarely does anything with it. I think the last time she was on was for me when TS4M's was down for a day or more.

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        • #5
          Facebook is a double edge sword. Yes it is nice to stay in touch with old friends and acquaintances. On the the other hand some people just don't know how to contain their lives.

          I woke up.
          I went to pee.
          I passed gas.
          My poop looked yellow today.

          Eating breakfast.
          Having frosted flakes, coffee, Look at this photo of me getting dressed. Opps don't look at my lover.

          I started the car....

          Well you get the drift~
          Flying at MACH4 +

          Comment


          • #6
            KLM seems to think that Facebook is a great idea. They're about to launch "social media seating" using Facebook.

            KLM to let airline travelers choose seating partners based on social media profiles | The Verge
            Angela

            If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.

            BTW, I'm still keeping track of how many times you annoy me.

            Comment


            • #7
              I have no use for Facebook or other social web sites. Gossip doesn't interest me. I cannot understand why people post intimate details of a personal nature and why anybody would be interested.
              John

              Comment


              • #8
                Facebook got me back in contact with some old friends, which I appreciate. A gazillion people from church are on it, most of whom post stuff I find either interesting or entertaining. A goodly number of my relatives are on it, whose posts are much less enjoyable.

                I hardly get on it, though. Try to check it out regularly (once a month at least), but I mostly drop in when hubby or one of the kids tells me I should check something out or something's going on I'm watching, like when my dad and brother drove to Alaska this past summer (last state to visit for both of them), and my brother posted pictures every few days. It's lovely for that sort of thing.

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                • #9
                  As someone who used to use Facebook all the time about five or six years ago when it first got popular, I have recently backed off of it now that I am older. Although a lot of my friends are on it, I don't feel the need to use it as much because I find it so much more personal to pick up the phone and call someone. I didn't find out my cousin (who I thought I was very close to) had moved to Nashville (we are from Florida) until she updated it on her Facebook page. I was incredibly hurt, and ever since then have not really used Facebook to connect with my friends and family. I haven't gone through the extent of deleting it but I have a feeling that is in my near future.

                  However, I don't think that enough people are willing to delete their Facebooks / don't use Facebook for it to lose any of it's current popularity and traffic. 800 million people is a LOT, and I'm not expecting that number to get any lower any time soon.

                  Twitter on the other hand....that's a whole different story.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    If you shun Facebook, then you can't do things like...ummm...."explain" why you "allegedly" beat your girlfriend to death

                    Facebook post offers explanation to pregnant woman's beating - Victorville Daily Press

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                    • #11
                      yikes.

                      no fb here. don't want it, don't need it.

                      I rarely take photos so nothing to see here, folks.

                      plenty of people I would like to remain "lost" to.

                      lastly, I'm rather a private person. There just ain't much I'd be saying. Felt the same way 15 years ago when too many people were starting their own websites, all about themselves. I just don't feel the need.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook ever since I joined at the behest of my sister who was living overseas at the time.
                        At the moment it's hate and I've deactivated it due to too many mindless posts from real life friends, who I have lost all respect for, because their life is all over facebook and their addiction is too awkward to witness.
                        It really is a privacy problem though as even if you're not on it, people still post stuff about you or your business.
                        Syd

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