Any Poets out there.......

[ArtsieAng Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close ArtsieAng]

These were entries to a Washington Post Competition.....They asked for a Two-Line Rhyme. The first line being the most romantic, and the second line being the least romantic. I thought they were very funny. Anybody have any others, they'd like to add?

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you, screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot.
This describes everything you are not.

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss.
But, I only slept with you, cause I was pissed.

I thought that I could love no other.
That is until I met your brother.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty, and so is your head.

I want to feel your sweet embrace.
But, don't take that paper bag, off your face.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes.
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

[tonyg Goomba & Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close tonyg]

Memories ! A friend and I used to write poetry to girfriends that was similarly uncomplementary and critical. We went under the name "The Winged Victor" - hopefully it was not all blamed on some other guy they knew named Vic.

[wackymother Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close wackymother]

In this genre, I am pleased to present the lyrics to She's My Girl, by the immortal Tom Lehrer. (Plus his intro to the song.)

She's My Girl

And now to the love song. I'm sure you're familiar with love songs on the order of He's Just My Bill, my man, my Joe, my Max, and so on where the girl who sings them tells you that, although the man she loves is anti-social, alcoholic, physically repulsive, or just plain unsanitary, nevertheless she is his because he is hers, or something like that. But as far as I know there has never been a popular song from the analogous male point of view, that is to say, of a man who finds himself in love with, or in this case married to, a girl who has nothing whatsoever to recommend her. I have attempted to fill this need. The song is called She's My Girl.

Sharks gotta swim, and bats gotta fly,
I gotta love one woman till I die.
To Ed or Dick or Bob
She may be just a slob,
But to me, well,
She's my girl.

In winter the bedroom is one large ice cube,
And she squeezes the toothpaste from the middle of the tube.
Her hairs in the sink
Have driven me to drink,
But she's my girl, she's my girl, she's my girl,
And I love her.

The girl that I lament for,
The girl my money's spent for,
The girl my back is bent for,
The girl I owe the rent for,
The girl I gave up Lent for
Is the girl that heaven meant for me.

So though for breakfast she makes coffee that tastes like shampoo,
I come home for dinner and get peanut butter stew,
Or if I'm in luck,
It's broiled hockey puck,
But, oh well, what the hell,
She's my girl,
And I love her.

[IreneLF Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close IreneLF]

I remember the beginning of this poem I received, composed in 7th grade by a guy friend of mine during extra test taking time :: (and no one ever called me Reeni ust to set the record straight)

Reeni, Reeni, beauty rare,
String is what you got for hair

I would give you all my love
But your skin is like a glove......


The rest has been forgotten over the years.

[ArtsieAng Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close ArtsieAng]

Memories ! A friend and I used to write poetry to girfriends that was similarly uncomplementary and critical. We went under the name "The Winged Victor" - hopefully it was not all blamed on some other guy they knew named Vic.

Oh, come on Tony, share with us one of your poems......I'm laughing, just thinking about the things you must have written.

[katiemack Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close katiemack]

When I gaze into your eyes, I feel so complete
Except when my nose catches a whiff of your feet.

[tonyg Goomba & Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close tonyg]

They are gone- that hard drive is long gone. But, coincidentally I did once have a roomate named Rini (last name). I also lived with a Ho for a while.

[katiemack Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close katiemack]

Who needs food when I am with you?
'Cause it makes me feel like I have stomach flu

[ArtsieAng Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close ArtsieAng]

When I gaze into your eyes, I feel so complete
Except when my nose catches a whiff of your feet.

Good one.

Did you make that up?

[ArtsieAng Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close ArtsieAng]

They are gone- that hard drive is long gone. But, coincidentally I did once have a roomate named Rini (last name). I also lived with a Ho for a while.

Well, maybe you can make one up then.

[katiemack Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close katiemack]

I'm your Romeo and you are my Juliet
But I would be smarter and be grateful you're dead.

[katiemack Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close katiemack]

When I saw you, I knew it was love at first sight and I had hot pants,
Now that I know you, I should have run away when I had the chance.

[katiemack Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close katiemack]

Good one.

Did you make that up?

Yes, you have inspired me! These are all originals.

[ArtsieAng Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close ArtsieAng]

Yes, you have inspired me! These are all originals.

Go for it girl!

[ArtsieAng Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close ArtsieAng]

We shared a special bond that one cannot see.
But now all I want to do is flee.