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Who Is Jack Schitt

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  • Who Is Jack Schitt

    For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt?
    We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack
    Schitt!'
    Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an
    intellectual way.

    Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer
    magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had
    one son, Jack.

    In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple
    produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull
    Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.

    Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high
    school dropout.

    After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.

    Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living
    with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as
    Noe Schitt Sherlock.

    Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a
    rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt.

    Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were
    inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens
    brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper
    announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were
    named Dawg, Byrd, and Horse.

    Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently
    returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.

    Now when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt,' you can proudly
    reply, “O-Ya I do and all his relatives too”.

    Sincerely,
    Crock O. Schitt

    REMEMBER: LAUGHING LOWERS THE BLOOD PRESSURE

    NOTE: PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO ANYONE WHO NEEDS A LAUGH.
    Robert

  • #2
    did you hear

    Thanks for a much needed laugh, Robert,

    ...but I think you missed the paper reporting this today:

    The NCAA basketball player Holie Schitt lost his temper when a fan came onto the court in protest of a defensive play made by Schitt. Schitt states: "I just had a reflex to defend myself when the guy came running at me....it was instinctive to react."

    The Headline reads: SCHITT HITS THE FAN.
    Life is short, live it with this awareness.

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    • #3
      ~ Thanks -- both of you -- really needed that!! ~
      Sue
      Perpetual Motion ~ Going Nowhere Fast!!

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      • #4
        Have to laugh every time I read
        Flying at MACH4 +

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        • #5
          Talk about a Schitt house.

          I have read this in the past and laugh every time. They are the most famous Schitt family.
          Timeshareforums Shirts and Mugs on sale now! http://www.cafepress.com/ts4ms

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          • #6
            Originally posted by bigfrank
            ... I have read this in the past and laugh every time. ...
            Funny Schitt comes around now and then!
            Robert

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