The Purina Diet

[lawren2 Malibu Beach Barbie & A Super Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close lawren2]

> > I have a Golden retriever. I was buying a large bag of Purina at >Wal-Mart
>and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog?
> > (DUH!)
> > On impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, and that I was
>starting the Purina Diet again. Although I probably shouldn't, because I'd
>ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I
>awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my
>orifices and IVs in both arms.
> > I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way it
>works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one
>or two every time you feel hungry and that the f ood is nutritionally
>complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
>practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story.)
> > Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog >food
>poisoned me. I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's
>butt and a car hit us both.
> > I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was
>laughing so hard!